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Men, now it your turn
By:tastelessjokes
Men are like......
.....placemats
they only show up when there's food on the table.
.....mascara
they usually run at the first sign of emotion.
.....bike helmets
they're good in emergencies but usually just look silly.
.....government bonds
they take so long to mature.
.....copiers
you need them in reproduction but that's about it.
.....lava lamps
fun to look at it but not all that bright.
.....bank accounts
without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
.....high heels
they're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.
.....curling irons
they're always hot and always in your hair.
.....mini skirts
if your not careful they'll creep up your legs.
.....handguns
keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.
Rules for Men...
1. The Female always makes The Rules.
2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. (If the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong.)
7. (If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.)
8. The Female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without express written consent from the Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female Wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to mind read at all times.
14. The Male who doesn't abide by The Rules, can't take the heat, lacks a backbone, and is a wimp.
15. Any attempt to document The Rules could result in bodily harm.
16. At no time can the Male make such comments as "Insignificant" and "Is that all?" when the Female is complaining.
17. If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void!
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